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Cassiopeium

Nous sommes condamnés à être libre

Saturday, November 8, 2008

影子与陀螺

它很忙,但仍难以阻止空虚的蚕食,作茧自缚般的痛苦,好像陀螺般旋转的生活,时刻都在动,越来越快,快到忘记了身上遭鞭打的痛。身不由己,若停下、倒下,就是死了,但也没有关系,周围数不胜数的陀螺仍在旋转,那是多么壮观的景象——大小胖瘦花纹色彩各异,但都做着同样的顺时针旋转,带起“呼呼”风声,而抽动它们的鞭子无处可寻,或是上帝无形的手,也或许本没有什么鞭子,陀螺们自顾自转着,忘记了何时开始,也不曾考虑终止,未意识到身边的其他陀螺与事物,却不约而同地形成一致。有快倒下的又被猛抽了一鞭,突然恢复了活力,而最先转着的在此刻却没入泥土之中,仿佛不曾存在,但亦无妨碍,存在过的意义何在?

有螺纹般的流沙中猛然窜出只手,牢牢攥住枯树只一根,再也不肯放开,流沙中一只孤单的灵魂,是将要溺死的影子。影子来自躯壳,在皮肉之上钻出一个洞,半透明的它就袅然飘出,最后发出清脆的“波”一声,它被彻底剥离了躯壳,有些沮丧地飘在风中,好像衣架上忘记收起的背心一件。它打听了,脚下黑漆漆一片,名叫涤罪所,购买赎罪券但没有手也没有口袋,躯干看似臃肿的充水气球,四肢仿佛新鲜鱼漂。它把右手(或叫右鱼漂)放在脑旁扭动,如摇动老式放映机般搅拌脑袋里的灰色物质,有关于放纵记忆的残渣好像咀嚼太多食物而从嘴角渗出的汁液般漉漉淌出。影子的内脏生痛生痛,它低头望去,腹腔也是半透明的,散出黯淡明灭的光芒,如搁置多日的汤汁般外表坚硬,内里有黏稠的物质缓缓流动。再仔细感受,痛楚好像穿过漏斗形的隧道般,突然放大许多倍,汹涌地扑过来。影子“嗷嗷”叫起,但即刻确认了自己尝试发声的失败。

影子想起了自己曾经属于的那个躯壳,还在原地旋转吧。

影子笑了笑,你在说什么呢?悠悠飘走了。

–>

posted by Cassiopeium at 4:19 pm  

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